You

This time of year, our souls beg to be examined, nurtured and validated.  In essence, fed.

In 2006, I crafted my first version of Permission to Shine (which at that time was subtitled, “The Art of Being Beautiful”) with a burning in my heart to give good women the go-ahead to beautify and nurture their souls and their bodies.  In that nurturance, they ignite their true essence and inspire everyone around them.  Most importantly, their families.

Permission to Shine has gone through a few revisions, culminating in this latest version – 10 Keys to Becoming Who You Were Born to Be.  I have thrown my heart into its production and feel complete with what it offers.  I believe it is soul food, but further – inspires a divine call to action.  My aim was create a message that, by listening, would compel a woman to take steps NOW to become who she really wants to be.  And change her corner of the world.

permissiontoshine

It’s about beauty.  It’s about confidence.  It’s about spirituality and purpose and shine factor.  The real kind.

I debated about whether or not to call it Womanhood 101.

Permission to Shine is crafted as an audio course in a 2 CD-set, or as an mp3 version, with over 90 minutes of instruction.  You can listen to sample tracks here.

I invite you to listen to this complete course and then share it with other women you care about.  One of the women going through my Stand, Speak, Shine coaching program just purchased 70 sets as Christmas gifts for the women in her life!  I am grateful that she sees value in it and has chosen to extend it as an offering.

Give it as a gift to YOU.

And watch this while you’re at it!

Eve’s Role as Helpmeet

eve sculpture

After God created Adam He declared, “I will make an helpmeet for him…” (Genesis 2:18)   What exactly is a “helpmeet”?

I developed my own offbeat translation of “helpmeet” in my early 20’s as I secretly struggled with the idea that woman might somehow be an “afterthought” or second-seat creation.  Jokingly, I would spout off to a few in my circle of friends, “Look – women were created as helpmeets, because let’s face it, men need help!”

But I’ve since learned that “helper” is not the literal translation!

Joseph Coleson, Professor of Old Testament at Nazarene Theological Seminary – a very respected scholar and archaeologist, says that the Hebrew Translation is: “I will make for him an ‘ezer cenegdo.”

Coleson says English versions consistently translate ‘ezer as “helper.”  ‘Ezer is used 20 times in the Old Testament: seventeen times to describe God and three times to describe a military ally or aide.  Even if we translate ‘ezer to mean helper, we must remember that English has different nuances than the Hebrew language does.  In English “helper” implies someone who is an apprentice, still learning, under someone in authority.  But in Hebrewhelper” implies one who has the power to give help—it refers to someone in a superior position.

There is another possible definition for ‘ezer: “power” or “strength.” “Helper” and “power or strength” are words are from the same Hebrew root and the nouns would be identical.

Cenegdo is two prepositions, and together their literal meaning is “facing.” 1) ce is the first preposition and it means “like” or “corresponding to.” 2) Negdo means to stand in someone’s presence.

Paired with ce it means to be in the presence of an equal. Together these two prepositions show the relationship between two people: it means they are standing or sitting facing each other, which shows they are equals.

Coleson:  “How should we translate the entire expression of ‘ezer cenegdo? A straightforward literal translation is,  I will make for him a power like unto him, facing him.”

I have seen other translations from Greek whose English translations read,  “It is not good that man should be alone.  I will make a companion of strength and power who has a saving power and is equal to him.”

Even though I was trying to be funny in my 20’s, there was an intuitive knowing, through my own observation and experience, that great men relied upon great women.  Enlightened men have a deep dependence on feminine help and strength.

And enlightened women have a deep dependence on masculine help and strength.

As I’ve matured and researched, it makes much more sense to me that “helpmeet” would translate to words such as strength, power, companion, saving, and equal.  They provide clearer and stronger insights into the mortal purpose of the feminine creation.

Eve was ushered in to this Earth realm with power – a unique power which Adam did not possess – to assist in the saving of mankind.  Likewise, Adam possessed strengths Eve did not.  Together, and only as one, could they help set the Earth and Humanity on course to fulfill their respective missions.

What Does It Mean to be a GREAT Woman?

I heard this “greatness” list on a group teaching call recently and loved it.  I love it because it affirms my position that “average”, “status quo”, “getting by” and “doing pretty good” is NOT what we were born for…

THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF GREATNESS

1. You shall remember who you are.

2. You shall let go of anything that stands between you and your greatness.

3. You shall take the high road in everyday thoughts, words and acts whether anyone is looking or not.

4. You shall Say “Yes” to the Spirit within without reservation.

5. You shall act in Faith.

6. You shall fully express your purpose, innate gifts and talents.

7. You shall live from your highest vision and manifest a life that is worthy of you.

8. You shall Love, be Love and be “in Love!”

9. You shall allow yourself to stand out naturally.

10. You shall assist others in remembering who they are and stepping into their greatness.

– Reggie Odom

This little blurb at the end pretty much says it all:

“Playing small is not what I had in mind for you.” – The Divine

I think many of us hold back from really “being” more because we fear others will perceive us unfavorably.  We go to their level of comfortability – absorbing their feelings of “less than” because we’ll seem superior if we try to be “more than.”  Silly girls.  We so often place the opinions of others before God’s!  HE wants us to soar and shine and be in our gifts and experience bliss and flow and passion and Light.  That way, His work gets done more quickly and we get to expand our souls in the process.

Remember Marianne Williamson’s reminder that our “playing small does not serve the world”?  That when we become liberated from what others think and feel our  “presence automatically liberates others”?

Wouldn’t it be reasonable to assume that if we actually did let our lights shine and play “big” we will set those naysayers FREE on some level?

I know in my heart I’m not trying to outshine anyone.  I just want to bring other women to God.  To peace.  To a knowledge of THEIR greatness and divinity.  Each of us, because of what we have passed through, are experts on something.  Time and experience have implanted within us seeds of greatness that, through our faith and courage, have the ability to spring forth and move masses of other people.

Oft-quoted, but here’s Marianne’s full statement:

marianne“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.’ We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we’re liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

I memorized this, heart and mind, in the year 2000, as I was going through my own awakening and transformation process.  I felt like it gave me permission to be more than ordinary, to break out of what was around me… a permission slip I desperately needed and was actually begging for, soul level.  I’ve realized that while we all need other people along the way to validate our efforts to move forward and be more, I need to trust that I can give myself that permission.

I need to trust that my relationship with Deity is solid enough that I will not go astray if I play big.  I need to trust the voice of God which to my heart almost constantly whispers, “Permission GRANTED.”

So, what does it mean to be a great woman?  A great woman is a woman who “gets” her Greatness.  She gives HERSELF permission to shine (hey! that phrase sounds familiar…I have a free audio on it on this site).  A great woman LEAPS forward with her heart at the forefront, inspiring others with Love and Light and enthusiasm… couched in her own sweet IMPERFECTION.

Greatness is not perfection, it’s just unabashed desire and courage.  Heed the call to Greatness.  The Earth needs what you have!

The Power of Words

as a man thinketh so is he

“And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.” (Genesis 1:3)

God said, and then there was.  Our Creator spoke life into existence.  We have the same power to speak life into our own little worlds.

We also have the capacity to destroy them.

I love words…always have.  Taught myself to read when I was 4 years old because words intrigued me so much.  I sensed their influence and significance and impact.  Words that come forth from our mouths -AND words that are formed in our minds- have the potential to injure or inspire ourselves and others.  Words have matter, force…power.

I did a short internship with Child Protective Services my 2nd year of college.  I say short, because it didn’t take me long to realize that working with the families of abused and neglected children was a little more than my 20 year-old heart could bear.  Hanging in the office of the social worker I did cases with was a poster of a little boy curled up in a corner.  It read, “Words hit harder than a fist.”

I have an inner child that needs healing.  All of us do.  We’ve been hurt by others’ words, and most of us are still listening to the scripts – the “tapes” – in our heads that downplay our magnificence.  We are continuously bombarded by the Adversary with mental/spiritual attacks in the form of injurious words regarding our worth and performance.

I really want to move past downplaying my worth and potential, and that of others.  I’ve often thought how amazing it would be to master beautiful, life-affirming speech in this life…speaking with the tongue of angels.  As in, nothing that comes out of my mouth does anything but build and heal.  Including the conversations I have with myself.

I’m reading Kevin Hall’s book, Aspire, and am loving it.  It’s all about the power of words.  He introduces the word, “Genshai“, which means that you should never treat another person in a manner that would make them feel small.  “If I were to talk by a beggar in the street and casually toss him a coin, I would not be practicing Genshai.  But if I knelt down on my knees and looked him in the eye when I placed that coin in his hand, that coin became love.  Then and only then, after I had exhibited pure, unconditional brotherly love, would I become a true practitioner of Genshai.”

I think we should practice Genshai on ourselves.  We should use the power of words to create personal beauty and meaning and love and greatness.

In my coaching business, I have women list their fears and inadequacies (negative thoughts about themselves).  Then, I have them list the antithesis to those fears and turn them into positive, life-affirming statements.  I have them carry the statements on notecards and hang them up in various spots in their home or car as reminders:  “I am stepping into supreme confidence and beauty”  “I have a deep understanding of who I am”  “I was born to shine” “I speak with power, truth and intelligence ”  “My eye is single to God and therefore my whole body is full of light”  “My mind is clear and focused”  “The Glory of GOD is manifest in ME”  “Angels attend my children and sentinels stand in my home”  “I am an ambassador for Christ”  “My body is fit and strong”  “I am powerful”  “I am on the Lord’s errand and am doing away with the fear of man”  “My gifts are being magnified”  “I am a woman of Faith and I only answer to my Father and my Savior” and my personal favorite,  “Just as Queen Esther, I WAS BORN FOR SUCH A TIME AS THIS.”

I used to read these over and over again, every day – for months – and it was amazing how my internal dialogue shifted.  It was wonderful how people began to respond to me differently; see me in a different light.  I’ve gotten away from this practice, and it’s time to come back.  Words literally have the power to rewire your mind – your DNA – to regard youself as intelligent and beautiful and queenly and precious.

Let there be Light.

Who Can Find a Virtuous Woman?

virtuous woman

Proverbs 31:

10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

(RARE; PRICELESS; of GREAT VALUE to GOD)

11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her

(a CROWN TO HER HUSBAND; TRUSTWORTHY)

13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

14 She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

(INDUSTRIOUS; a PLANNER; SELF-SUFFICIENT)

15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

(TAKES INITIATIVE; GENEROUS to ALL)

16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

(WISE STEWARD; HARD WORKER)

17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.  

(ARMS HERSELF SPIRITUALLY; TAKES CARE of her BODY)

18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.  

(DISCERNING; POSITIVE; CONSISTENT; a LIGHT to the WORLD)

20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. 

(SERVES the LESS FORTUNATE; COMPASSIONATE)

21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

(PREPARED; UNAFRAID)

22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

(CREATIVE and RESOURCEFUL; has a BEAUTIFUL, POWERFUL “IMAGE”)

25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

(INTEGRITIOUS; CONFIDENT; FAITHFUL; JOYFUL)

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.  

(THINKS BEFORE SHE SPEAKS; KIND; WISE)

27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

(ORGANIZED; NOT IDLE; CREATES a HOUSE of ORDER)

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

(Instills LOVE and RESPECT in her HUSBAND and CHILDREN)

30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.

(MEEK; HUMBLE; Not preoccupied with beauty/exterior self; RELIANT on GOD; PRAISEWORTHY)

This is Divine Femininity.  This is the application of Light and truth.  As women, this is our model.  I cannot think of another place in God’s word that gives us such a comprehensive overview of God’s purpose for us as women and His Divine Design for our existence.

It does not mean we are “perfect” in each category.  However, each of these categories hold potential for further study and research…a challenge for us to gain further Light and knowledge in each of these areas as we mature, refine ourselves and carry forth our unique, personal beauty and missions.

This “virtuous woman” is LIVING her Purpose.  She creates and rejoices in what she has created.

She lives her passion, she has hobbies and she is engaged in life.  She is in the world, but not of it.  She is active and involved in doing what she loves and in adding to the increase of her household.  Her heart is at home, and she recognizes this as her most important stewardship and blessing.

Most importantly, a virtuous woman DOES NOT FEEL GUILTY FOR DOING WHAT SHE LOVES.  She just goes forward, trusting her heart and trusting God.

There are not enough virtuous women walking this planet.  God recognizes such women as rare and priceless.  Ladies, the time is short.  The winding-up scenes of the Earth are upon us.  We MUST prepare.  Lately, I have been thinking almost continuously of the Parable of the 10 Virgins in the Holy Bible – 10 righteous women, but 5 are prepared, and 5 are not when the “bridegroom cometh.”  All ten are women of faith, but five are virtuous women…alive in Christ and full of hope and purpose.

Don’t be like the women of the world.  Stand out with Godly attributes and be something different…something higher…something more beautiful.  A very wise religious leader said, “Resolve NOW to rise to the stature of the divinity within you.”

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Get Rich Quick with the Truth of Who You Are

widows mite

A scriptorian friend sent this quote along a few days ago:

“When you come to know yourselves, then you will become known, and you will realize that it is you who are the sons [and daughters!] of the living Father. But if you will not know yourselves, you dwell in poverty, and it is you who are that poverty.”   (The Gospel of Thomas, The Nag Hammadi Library, James M. Robinsoon, General Editor, Harper & Row, 1977, p. 118)       Is that not amazing?  The Nag Hammadi texts were found in Egypt in the 1940’s and are said to be writings of ancient apostles and other spiritual leaders.  I feel they contain much Truth, and I love perusing them.  The aforementioned is from the Gospel of Thomas.       Think about what this is saying – it’s really not reinventing the wheel or anything.  It’s just saying that as we move towards understanding our authentic natures, we move towards becoming known.  We start to “get” everything as we start to “get” ourselves.  There is no confusion about life when there is no confusion about our personal worth.  And that personal worth can only be defined through the lens of Heaven…through the Father in whose image we were created.        Further, when we fail to recognize our status as Children of the Most High, we live in “poverty.”  That’s really not talking about the lack of material wealth as much as it is talking about lack of spiritual riches.  Soul wealth.  Abundance of spirit.        “…it is you who are that poverty.”  Yikes!  When we ignore the inner wisdom that guides us to the Truth of our divine natures, we exist in a state of destitution.  Beggars who are going everywhere but to the real Source to solicit a state of wellbeing will continue to wallow in impoverished LACK.  Such is no way to live, regardless of numbers in a bank account or lavish surroundings.       There’s only one way to feel rich….and to get rich QUICK (like, at the speed of Light).  Start network marketing via the spiritual pipeline route.  Choose Jesus Christ as your direct upline 🙂  He guides you to the abundant wealth of who you really are.       “For ye know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that, though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, that ye through his poverty might be rich.”  (2 Cor. 8:9)

Give Your Self the Perfect Gift This Christmas

I am convinced that the #1 Truth women resist accepting and comprehending is that of their personal worth.

God our Father – because He’s our Father – wants us to walk this Earth with a knowledge of our Divinity.  He wants us to “get” ourselves…with humility…with an open heart…and with an expansive mind.  Each of us, without exception, have a Divine Nature.  We are created from the holiest, most ancient substance in the Cosmos; everlasting to everlasting.

Why do we resist really internalizing this?

Probably because of our inherent mortal weaknesses, our pathetic physical forms, and our constantly changing and unpredictable environment.  Oh, and the fact that imperfect people all around us are constantly countering every Truth we seek to uncover.  About our glorious DNA.

But does an earthly person need to acknowledge our worth to make it real?

If we dig deep enough, we come to realize that a major part of our Savior’s mission was to teach us of the “God within.”  The Divine substance we were created from, and the magnificent potential we carry because of it, were an integral part of what He shared during His ministry.  If He could only get us to see ourselves through His – and Father’s –  eyes, we would never doubt our worth.

Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and [that] the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? (1 Cor. 3:16)

Jesus answered them, Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are gods?  (John 10:34)

Neither shall they say, Lo here! or, lo there! for, behold, the kingdom of God is within you. (Luke 17:21)

If you haven’t already downloaded my free ebook, Love Thyself, please take it as my gift to you this Christmas.

More importantly, accept it as a gift to your Self….’cause She’s been wanting it all year 🙂

christmas

It was Rachmaninoff, and I cried…

miss america crown

I often get asked what my perspective on pageants are, now that it’s been almost 7 years since I held a title…

SUCH a loaded question.

Looking back, I see my pageantry path as one of Divine Tutoring.  Really.  It held amazing value in learning about beauty, articulation, carriage and refinement.  I have been able to meet incredible women of all ages whom I’ve had the opportunity to coach and mentor, “judge” and direct – women who have taught me priceless lessons about Life and myself.  Hard lessons.

Pageants taught me that all women have an innate need – not just desire, but need – to have our beauty and voices honored and celebrated.

It also taught me that we should not judge anyone else’s journey to wholeness.  If I had a dollar for every raised-eyebrowed woman who nonverbally communicated her disapproval of my choice to compete in pageants – displacing the upstanding Christian wife and mother they once believed me to be – I could probably retire.

I learned that when you get the go-ahead from God, that is all that matters.  The voices of others simply must be drowned out when you embark on the True Path He has placed before you.

Even if that “True Path” involves throwing on a swimsuit and a pair of heels and marching out on stage.   Such CAN be a spiritual journey for a woman of Christ…

Would I do it again?  No point.  As a 30-something, it was my divinely orchestrated course.  As a 40-something, it’s not.  I continue to do pageant coaching, but ONLY for those ladies who have gotten that go-ahead from the Heavens…and are doing it for the right reasons.

That worldly crown, I have discovered, is a total illusion

Too often I have seen beautiful and spiritually regal women walk away from a pageant competition feeling less-than, lacking and falling short…simply because they didn’t bring home some manmade, rhinestone-clustered $50 tiara.  I see others searching for a worldly crown to somehow validate their worth.  Or to garner the attention from those they can’t seem to get it from.  Tragic.

My feeling is that God would have all of His daughters discern the priceless, eternal, invisible crowns that adorn our war-torn heads.  By continuing to just look up.

All hell and a tornado broke loose the year I had the crown – it definitely wasn’t stacked with roses and parades.  My husband lost his job, my son was diagnosed with Aspergers, my sister entered a rehab while I cared for two of her children, and then…that same sister took her life 3 weeks before I passed on my crown.  So yes, the earthly crown is an illusion.

We all have spiritual titles that will never get validated through earthly competitions.

My almost 12-year-old daughter Savannah just started taking piano lessons from 2009’s Miss Utah, Whitney Merrifield.  Whitney did a living room concert for Savannah and I – in an attempt, I think, to give my Savannie a glimpse of what is possible.  It was the piece she played at Miss America – the Miss America Pageant she “lost.”

It was Rachmaninoff, and I cried.

I cried because my sister loved Rachmaninoff when she was alive and I cried because my daughter was sitting next to me with wide-open eyes and a wide-open future and I cried because I love music and I love beauty…and I am moved beyond words by seeing both displayed through the willing hands of a gifted and lovely daughter of God.

Last Monday afternoon, Whitney was our Miss America.

The take-home gift I received from my time as Mrs. Utah is best described in an excerpt from “My Kingdom” by Louisa May Alcott.

I do not ask for any crown But that which all may win Nor seek to conquer any world Except the one within.

Be thou my guide until I find, Led by a tender hand, Thy happy kingdom in myself And dare to take command.

God’s Girl

I took a fall today after my sister’s wedding.  Tripped over – more like slammed into – a large metal bike rack and fell flat on my stomach.  Scrapes and bruises and sidewalk burns all over my shins, knees and hands.  Yep, it was funny (!), but it was also hu…MIL..iating!  Was feeling a little sorry for myself, being weak and foolish in front of all those people, having to limp around all afternoon and evening.

And then I was reminded of a video a friend had shared on her Facebook page this morning – a video of this glorious daughter of God named Gianna, who limps through her life with Divine purpose…

God’s timing with my stupidity and weakness is amazing.  Of course He knew I’d be skidding onto a sidewalk at 3:30, so He’d need to embed the lesson 5 hours previous.  Via this video.

I was moved beyond belief as I watched Gianna Jessen this morning.  I had to share it here, because Gianna’s spiritual courage is nothing short of awe-inspiring.

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I was riveted the entire 16 minutes.  Click on her name below to watch:

Gianna Jessen

As a survivor of a late-term saline abortion, Gianna’s calling and life path is to spread a message about “declaring life.”  This is not about politics to her, it’s about taking a stand for Truth, despite the voices of others.  She answers only to Christ, and makes that very clear.  I admire that in a person more than anything…

Gianna’s views on “beautiful suffering” is amazing.  Her struggles with Cerebral Palsy, undergoing extensive physical therapy, often unable to walk without assistance, being “hated from conception”…are, as she says, “a small price to pay to be able to blaze through the world as I do to offer hope.”  What grand eternal perspective!

Though she was considered a “throw away” by her bio mom, she sees herself as “God’s Girl” and tells others they better be nice to her because her Father owns the world.  (love it)

I think the most powerful thing she shared with the lawmakers was, “There are things that you will only be able to learn through the weakest among us.”  Reminds me of this scripture:

“…God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty(1 Cor. 1:27)

Sometimes God’s Messengers come cloaked in forms we wouldn’t expect.

At the end of her presentation Gianna said that Jesus Christ’s name can make people so terribly uncomfortable.  “But,” she says, “I didn’t survive to make people comfortable.”

Wow.  Chills when she made that declaration.

I guess what I appreciated most about what she said was that as God’s Limping Girl, she falls often…sometimes gracefully, sometimes not.

I can relate.

FULL Potential, Part 2

true potential

“The ultimate truth of who you are is not ‘I am this’ or ‘I am that’…but I am.”

Eckhart Tolle

I explored in Full Potential Part 1 the prospect of calling down miracles, parting the veil, and realizing the blessings the scriptures promise in their fullness and entirety.  Seems a stretch to many – okay most – perhaps even “crossing the line” or “looking beyond the mark.”

It’s the stuff reserved for the NEXT life, right?

A well-meaning religious leader of mine, a knowledgable man whom I knew loved and respected me, called me into his office and warned me against looking beyond the mark.  I had too many questions he couldn’t answer, deep questions of great spiritual import – or so I thought at the time.  I would not revisit those questions for at least a decade after his gentle chastisement, fearing that if I did, I would be going beyond the bounds of what was religiously “allowed.”

That was almost 20 years ago.  Now I don’t just “think” – but I KNOW – they were of massive eternal significance to me personally.  I have had them answered since then, through diligent personal study and my mile-wide spiritual stubborn streak.  Because I wasn’t getting answers that were sitting right with me, I went straight to the Source.  Figured the answers could be found therein…and I was not disappointed.  I have since learned The Master Teacher never turns away a starving student.

He IS “the mark”…and I was not looking beyond Him those 20 years ago, but had my eyes fixed steadfastly upon Him, humbly searching.  No person (however much religious seniority they held over me), no institution, no program and no earthly organization could hold Him back from answering my honest questions.  Which is why I love Him – and His plan for getting answers -so much.

I bring this up because we often feel alone in our searches; insignificant and “off the mark.”   Insignificance, I’ve decided, is actually one of my core issues.  I sometimes think I came with it.

M. Catherine Thomas addresses this “insignificance” in the essay I referenced in Part 1:

“The problem lay in my unconscious weak definitions of myself. I realized that if we were to ask the Lord to describe Himself, He would give us a list of powerful self-definitions, of I AM’s, that He had lived into: Truth, Love, Mercy, Power. We, on the other hand, have a lot of “I AM’s” in our heads that do not serve us. Listening to self-definitions that are disempowering and unforgiving of self creates a particular reality, a shrinking into our fears. How is it we so often get in our own way? How do we get out of our way?… Consider the weak “I AM’s” in the scriptural accounts of Moses in contrast to the Lord’s: Moses responds to the Lord’s invitation to deliver a provocative message to Pharoah: “Who am I, that I should go unto Pharaoh and bring forth the children of Israel out of Egypt?” He asks, Who should he say sent him?  The Lord answers cryptically and powerfully, “I AM THAT I AM…. I AM hath sent me unto you.”  (Exodus 3:14). This is a Being who has no weak definitions of Himself…”

“Sooner or later we realize that the time has come to find greater spiritual power, to own our divinity, and to live with greater confidence — with boldness…The Apostle Paul encourages us to the same thing. “Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace that we may … find grace to help in time of need” (Hebrews 4).””He exhorts us to have “boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus” (Hebrews 10)….This confidence begins in our thoughts, in the way we use our mind. We are highly potentiated beings who may have excused ourselves for not being who we really are.” “I AM has power.”

I have far to go in overcoming the weak definitions I have of myself.  I am starting to learn, as I mentioned in Part 1, that having weak definitions of the self is NOT humility.  Who we really are does not lie in our fears or insecurities, it lies in the love, light and truth we were created with.  Yes, we must have a deep recognition of our powerlessness without Jesus, but powerlessness is not insigificance.  Powerlessness is a state of deep reliance; the Sacred Station of Surrender.

The ultimate truth of who we really are is found in the I AM.  We are co-creators with the Master of the Universe; the maker of heaven and earth.  And we only discover the Truth of our identities – and of our very existence – by going straight to Him, and only Him.  It’s a sacred and personal process.

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And He will never turn away an honest seeker.